Are we using tech? Or is tech using us?
A few years ago, I recognized my cell phone had become glued to me and it was not providing me delight, freedom, or fulfillment by any sustainable measure. In fact, it was making me anxious, stressed, pessimistic, unhealthy, and a shitty companion.
As a Gen X’er, I remember very clearly what life was like pre-cell phones.
The timelessness of life
Clear, focused thoughts
Blissful daydreaming
Boredom that led to creative living
Intuitively knowing where to find your friends on a Saturday afternoon, and the fun of getting out to find them
Eye contact and random connections while out in the world
Showing up on time, because you couldn’t text someone that you were going to be 15 minutes late
The news being a footnote of your day or week, and rarely “BREAKING”
Pre-cell phones, when you left high school, it felt like the end of it for many of us, and blissfully so! How could I know that in 2008 all these faces and names, blurred in my memory, would come rushing back, pinging my new Facebook account with friend requests that now required hours of time to manage.
Did I need to know that my 8th grade crush has 4 kids and just had fish for dinner? No! But, there I was looking at a picture of his family and their dinner plates rather than walking on the beach, having a meal with my own loved one, talking with my neighbor, reading a book, cleaning out a drawer, or staring at a wall.
I look back now to that time, and the thrill I felt with all this new “connection” and technology.
I see the before times.
Before cell phones and screens were ubiquitous. Before 24-hour, world-wide news cycles vied for our nervous system activation. Before work had access to us everywhere we are at all times of day. Before social media telling us every moment of our lives needs to be curated, captured, and shared, for the low, low price of our sense of self and being present with the magic of life.
Over the past 15 years or so, the blinking, pinging, attention grabbing contents of my cell phone, hijacked my brain stem and consumed countless hours of my precious life.
I’m going to bet yours, too.
Just recently, I attended a blissful, healing retreat where we were asked to check our phone in when we got there.
I pitched it in the basket and didn’t look back!
The 3 days at this event felt like an endless, perfect summer of delightful freedom!
Do you remember that feeling of a wide open expanse of time when you were a kid?
If you grew up with tech consuming your life, maybe not, but pre-tech, days lasted forever!
And, that is what it felt like at this retreat without my phone, but in the best way, not in the watching the clock at a shit job waiting to clock out kinda vibe. No, this was riding the waves of just being, in a flow state with the best of life, and the richness of blissful connection.
When it came time to leave, I waited until the very last minute to get my phone.
My heart started thumping with anxiety as I headed toward the basket. I turned it on with trepidation and quickly closed the home screen.
I didn’t want to see what awaited me.
It took me several days to get through all my pings, dings, and red flag alerts, and I’m sure I missed some things. So be it.
The thing is, nothing bad happened being off my phone.
If I missed anything, oh well, I am blissfully unaware of it. I’m thriving and feeling so much better for taking a break from being tethered to the mini-computer that beckons to be my constant companion at the expense of all that actually matters.
Having real-life, heartfelt, breathing, thinking, feeling, loving companions in your day to day life are so much more satisfying than those pings from your phone.
And, so often, those little screens we carry with us everywhere get in the way of us having what we need the most…each other.
I write to you now with all alerts off, any pages that could possibly grab my attention blocked with my Freedom App. and my phone forgotten in some unknown corner in the house.
I’ve noticed my phone less and less in my hand since this recent detox, and it feels great!
Here’s a few things I notice happen after a screen detox:
I connect with loved ones more
I exercise much more consistently
I sleep more and better
I read more and actually absorb it
I feel more at peace and optimistic
I feel more playful and fun
I feel more loving and available
I make my space feel good and tidy
I eat more whole foods and less protein bars
Sound appealing?
Do you have a sneaking suspicion it’s time to take a break from your screens… like a real break?
Or maybe, like me, you are ready to throw it in the nearest recycling bin and blissfully get lost everywhere you go without Google Maps.
Where are you at with screens in your life?
Do they leave you feeling Delightfully Free?
Are they sustainably serving YOU to build a fulfilling life you love?
Don’t get me wrong, I love the freedom technology does provide me, and many of the advances we’ve experienced are providing us incredible opportunities to liberate ourselves.
So, I’m not advocating to throw your screens out. Not at all.
I am advocating that we regularly consider the balance and sustainability of our use.
I am advocating for us all to ponder, are we using tech, or is tech using us?
I’d love to hear from you about your thoughts on this and if you are feeling Delightfully Free and fulfilled in your relationship with tech.
With love and in solidarity,
Annie
